Here we are, back at Monday. I've been trying to think of goals for this week, but its been rather hard. I still don't exactly know what i am going to decide, maybe i'll just write until i think of something? Here we go...
exercise
I have been slacking the past few weeks. Exercise. every. day. this. week. i need to do it. and along with this i should be drinking more water. 8 cups of water every day. (eeer excuse me while i go fill up my water cup...twice) This week is technically spring break from school, so i have no excuse to not make exercise a priority.
this weekend
keep myself busy
Monday, March 15, 2010
Hi my name is Becky, and I have OCD.
SO, I've been thinking lately (that might be the first problem) that maybe my obsession with patterns, and numbers, and routine might not be as helpful as I thought.
What initially triggered my awareness of this compulsion is my invoices. Everyday at work i invoice all the tickets, and then staple them. I staple these tickets in groups of 4 in between my fingers, cute i know. My favorite thing is when the invoices are in multiples of 4, so the last group fills my finger gaps perfectly. amazing. Every time this happens, it puts a smile on my face! but, obviously, this doesn't always happen, so when it doesn't i feel like i need to fix it. It now bothers me if the invoices are uneven. silly right?
Ever since i recognized this invoice trend, i started to see other habits i have. For example, i check websites in the same order after my work is finished, and it bugs me if i disrupt that order. Or, as i awkwardly found out, i want the dishes to be done in a specific way... or just cleaning the house in general. I have to search my radio presets from 1-6 and can't go back to 1 before i click the rest (only sometimes on this one) im sure everyone has things they do like this that make them feel comfortable.
Basically, my question is at what point are these routines helpful, and when do they become a burden on myself and others. Am i creating a routine that my creative, spontaneous self is afraid to break? Is my need for these things affecting others, negatively?
am i overthinking the way i overthink things? lol opinions?
What initially triggered my awareness of this compulsion is my invoices. Everyday at work i invoice all the tickets, and then staple them. I staple these tickets in groups of 4 in between my fingers, cute i know. My favorite thing is when the invoices are in multiples of 4, so the last group fills my finger gaps perfectly. amazing. Every time this happens, it puts a smile on my face! but, obviously, this doesn't always happen, so when it doesn't i feel like i need to fix it. It now bothers me if the invoices are uneven. silly right?
Ever since i recognized this invoice trend, i started to see other habits i have. For example, i check websites in the same order after my work is finished, and it bugs me if i disrupt that order. Or, as i awkwardly found out, i want the dishes to be done in a specific way... or just cleaning the house in general. I have to search my radio presets from 1-6 and can't go back to 1 before i click the rest (only sometimes on this one) im sure everyone has things they do like this that make them feel comfortable.
Basically, my question is at what point are these routines helpful, and when do they become a burden on myself and others. Am i creating a routine that my creative, spontaneous self is afraid to break? Is my need for these things affecting others, negatively?
am i overthinking the way i overthink things? lol opinions?
Monday, March 8, 2010
today i will be productive
I have decided that this blog shouldn't just be about goals, but also i will talk about my day to day life. are you excited? lol
so this weekend was exactly what i needed. i didn't work Saturday so the entire weekend was mine, to do whatever i wanted. After a fabulously relaxing weekend im back at work and fully charged. i feel so alert and mentally prepared.
i read an interesting article this morning about how busy is a state of mind, and a very broad term used for many things. mostly busy is a cop-out. people don't usually want less things, they want the right things. i thought this post was very insightful and found that i often use the term busy, when i really don't have much to do, but instead i just want to get out of doing something. i need to be honest and organized, not make excuses for myself.
so this weekend was exactly what i needed. i didn't work Saturday so the entire weekend was mine, to do whatever i wanted. After a fabulously relaxing weekend im back at work and fully charged. i feel so alert and mentally prepared.
i read an interesting article this morning about how busy is a state of mind, and a very broad term used for many things. mostly busy is a cop-out. people don't usually want less things, they want the right things. i thought this post was very insightful and found that i often use the term busy, when i really don't have much to do, but instead i just want to get out of doing something. i need to be honest and organized, not make excuses for myself.
this week in "becky has goals"
my first and only goal of the week i think will be the hardest goal yet. i have been pushing the idea around in my head for a while, but knew that today it needed to be done. this week i am going to avoid all office gossip. i will not talk about anyone, i will not engage in listening to latest updates. Working for a small business creates a lot of gossip, everyone knows everything about everyone else. and its pretty annoying. so starting right now i will not be the cause, but instead the solution ;)
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